Protect the essence of who you are

March 10, 2022

As I write this article it’s International Women Day and I wanted to spread some buds of love and worthiness here in this virtual community. Just because we all deserve them.

The file rouge of my message today is this:

Protect the essence of who you are.

It’s an unusual answer to the question many women ask themselves: How can I accept myself as I am?

I’ll start with this quote from Thich Nhat Hanh’s The Art of Power:

“To be beautiful means to be yourself. You don’t need to be accepted by others. You need to accept yourself.

When you are born a lotus flower, be a beautiful lotus flower, don’t try to be a magnolia flower.

If you crave acceptance and recognition and try to change yourself to fit what other people want you to be, you will suffer all your life.

True happiness and true power lie in understanding yourself, accepting yourself, having confidence in yourself.”

As much as seeking other’s people validation is normal and you’d really need to live on a desert island not to experience that, coming back to who you really are when no one is around, and connecting with that whenever judgment arises, will help you live life at your own terms. That’s always a win.


Because, as Thich Nhat Hanh suggest in the quote at the beginning of this article, trying to be a magnolia flower, when you were born a lovely lotus flower, causes suffering.

The more you discover, cherish, embrace and protect who you really are, your values, your unique voice, your skills, the easier and more naturally life will flow.

A woman's face in black & white

There’s a lot of noise around “Finding yourself”.

However, I don’t believe this is how it truly works. You ( just like any other being on this planet) are not lost.

The fact is that there are so many people telling you who to be – your parents, siblings, friends, partners, teachers, bosses, influencers, politicians…ugh. It’s very exhausting.

In this scenario, it’s very easy to get caught in all the opinions and draw wrong conclusions from all these different inputs.

You are already whole. You are here on purpose, right where you need to be. 

So, from my point of view, “finding yourself” is simply deciding who you want to be without all that noise and the judgment of the world.

And protect that essence of who you are, like you would protect the most important person in your life.

Spreading more buds of love and worthiness

I don’t want to be the only voice in this article spreading buds of love and worthiness.

Indeed, I want the work of some amazing women out there do this job too.

So, I’ll share with you below some of the most empowering messages I’ve seen around lately, all voiced by women I utterly admire and find myself constantly inspired by.

Here we go!

Tara Mohr’s poem: Hey Beautiful, This Is Your Time

a bunch of colorful tulips

This is your time.

Your time to say what you have kept silent.

Your time to ask your big questions without apology.

Your time to shine like a blazing comet,

whether they like it or not.

Your time to believe what your heart tells you:

that this world could be very different.

Your time to live by your rhythms,

and teach them to the world.

Your time to nurture your village back to health.

Your time to show the world what it has been missing.

Your time to show the world the other side of itself.

I hope these got you inspired to go out there and spread some buds of love and worthiness with the women in you life.

I’m also here if you’d like to share some with me!

With kindness,


A picture of me

Written by Donatella Porceddu

I am a registered psychologist and life coach specialised in binge and emotional eating, body kindness, and mindful eating. I empower women to become the best version of themselves through my comprehensive approach, which combines personal coaching and psychology, leveraging my client’s strengths and building around their opportunities.

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If you have any questions, reach out to me today. I’ll be more than happy to connect with you and see how I can help.

Donatella Porceddu Psychologist & Eating Coach specialised in Binge Eating, Overeating, Emotional Eating, Food freedom, anti-diet approach. 1:1 support through my Make Peace with Food program.

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